Last week I was lucky enough to compete in a Drachenboot (Dragon boat) race at
Essen Baldeneysee. I got in at the last minute because a friend/coworker at Jülich got a nasty mosquito bite on his hand and couldn't compete. Poor guy's entire hand was puffed up like a balloon!
I looked up dragon boats before the race and found some fantastic pictures. I thought we'd be paddling something like this:
but our were a bit more modest:
A
dragon boat is a really long, narrow paddle boat with a caller in the prow and a helmsman in the stern. Our boats had 20 paddlers and massive animal-hide drums for the caller to beat time with. The sport originated in China and is popular in Germany. There's even a
national dragon boat association! The Berlin team was the world champion in 2005.
The drums were my favorite part. Waaaaaay better than the plastic dragon prow. The beating sounds like a giant heart and makes me feel like Ben-Hur.
Our valiant team, composed of mathematicians, scientists, engineers, and nerds in general, was called "Die Blauen Füchse" (the blue foxes). The explanation for the name, given in English, went like this: "There is a kindergarten called the foxes. And when you drink too much, you are blue. So we are the blue foxes." Apparently, we are a walking tribute to juvenile delinquency.
The team!
We raced four times, and every race was fantastic! The race starts with the announcement "Are you ready? Attention! Go!" and then everyone paddles furiously. We splashed and tossed water everywhere and if anyone's stroke got out of sync he was sure to toss buckets of water in your face. There was a gentle headwind for the whole of the course, which grew into a powerful, gusting wind by the end of the day. We finished each run with an inch or two of water in the bottom of the boat, and several gallons in my lap. It was easy to see which side of the boat you sat on; your inward side was your only hope of a dry stitch.
There were 36 teams in total, all of them crazy and most of them sporting outlandish costumes. There was a prize for best team uniform, so people came dressed as old fogies, hippies, sea creatures, secretaries, pirates, and monks. Team Love Boat wore tie-dye, and team Daytona showed up as race car drivers, and even brought their own mini-cars.
I wish we had dressed up and mentioned it to my friend Ivo. "Come on!", I said, "We're not even competing. You'd think 25 mathematicians would come up with something." We both thought a moment and then said, in the same breath: "Integral signs." Nerds on parade.
Some teams were really competitive and showed up in skin-tight waterproof shorts and spandex. Never in my life have I seen more banana hammocks, even counting the 15-or-so triathlons I've done. These people know they have to win to regain any self respect for their appearance. Its not like a bike race where you're going too fast for anyone to see anything. And when that cloth gets wet... well... the Germans have a relaxed sense of decency.
It was brilliant sailing weather, and by the end of the day boats of every size were flying up and down the lake. One guy nearly capsized his dinghy on an jibe when his jib tangled in the forestays. (That's the last time I show off my nautical vernacular. I swear.)
The wind gave a spirit of joy to the giant yellow people, prompting them to hug small children.
This is team Dragon Hunter, by far the best-dressed team in the place. Not only did they dress as monks, and not only did they bring Gregorian music to play as they boarded their boat, but they even dressed in
hokie colors! They won the much coveted costume party prize.
We played around on the lake all day, and in the end came in 16th of 36. Not too shabby for a boat full of geeks. If you want to see what we look like in action,
take a look at this movie I made.
The adventures didn't end at the lake, though. The weather had been fantastic all day, but on the way home we got caught on the Autobahn in the most intense hail storm I've ever seen! The hail was a good 1/2" across and brought traffic to a screeching halt. We had to cover our ears for the sound of ice smashing on the roof, but we didn't get really worried until we started watching cracks crawl across the windshield. We were literally watching the ice destroy the window before our very eyes! The hail was so large it tore branches off trees and smashed up dozens of cars. Our windshield was a complete write-off, and the car was covered in dents. It looked like a toddler had taken a ball-peen hammer to the car. Unfortunately, I didn't get a picture.
Not being the owner of this dearly lamented automobile, I had a marvelous day.
